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http://nevercryoverspilledmilk.wordpress.com

Please I ask please check out my new blog, I am trying a new change for the new year and this a new start for the new year. 


Love and hugs,
Kelly

Hey everyone!!! To everyone reading this how ya doing?? It looks like its going to be a white Christmas for us. Not sure about everyone else but for us it sure is. 

For anyone who reads this what is or was your All time favorite memory of Christmas??

Well, growing up mine was on Christmas eve, my parents and I would drive to my grandma's house. After dinner we had this whole ordeal we would go through. My dad has his chair he would sit in every year and at a certain time he would tell us kids to go upstairs to look for Santa and his reindeer and then all of a sudden he would yell and we would come running down the stairs because he would say that he thought he saw him on the front lawn. Sure enough that's where he was. lol.. Then there was a special chair in the same spot every year and Santa would come in and say the same exact thing year after year. 

For years I believed in the big guy, until I was like 12 or 13, lol and thats how I kept it for my daughter and up until last year my daughter still somewhat believed in him too!! It was awesome. But, back to the story!!

He would come in and sit down and we would go up to him all excited and take turns handing out presents from his big red bag. When all the presents were done, we would take turns getting our pictures taken and out the door he would go. Right away, us kids would go running up the stairs to see if we could see him and the reindeer take off from the roof of the house or somewhere close to there. Year after year we looked but never did see anything.

Shortly after we opened the rest of the presents under Grandma's Christmas tree, we would pack up the car and head back home to set out cookies and milk for Santa, carrots for Rudolph and the other reindeer and the infamous letter to Santa. With hopes he would stop at my house and write me back each and every year. I did that same tradition with J each and every year until last year and she believed it to the T, It was awesome. 

Then on Christmas Day, mom would wake us up with her home cooked breakfast and after several times of bugging her to open presents before we ate, and getting yelled at for it, I finally gave up and just ate breakfast...lol.. Then we opened presents and spent a bit of time together and then it was mom and me to do whatever, usually grocery shopping and dad would visit his friend up the street for the afternoon. Mom and I would also take a trip around to several houses with mom's baked goods, another tradition we had. 

Then when I was old enough to realize Santa was really whoever played him that year at Grandmas, I also learned of the "ins and outs", and the behind the scenes of the making of Santa, I would be the one soon after to get Santa ready. You know the make-up, the fluffing of the pillow, messing of his hair just right. To see the looks on the kids faces as he walked in made it all worth wild. To know that it was all made possible by me!!

Then, came along the time that my daughter started getting old enough to understand Santa and be the one to run up to him and hand out the presents and the look on her face as he came through the door. When he would say her name, it was all just priceless!! To hear her say on Christmas Day, "Momma, can we open presents now?" Again Priceless!!! Now I have D who sat on Santa's lap perfectly, it was AWESOME!! We got the best picture of the two girls, with the exception of J wearing gym shoes...lol..I can't wait til she gets old enough to understand what Santa is all about and what presents are, then it will be interesting!!!

Then times come to an abrupt stop, and people change, people cause others who they thought were family cause that all to end for whatever reason, family tradition for over 50 years because of whatever reason, reasons better left unmentioned.

Now, things have changed of course, people pass on, family gets smaller but little did I know a couple years just how small my family really would get. En though it broke my heart the time was due, J needed to know the truth. She needed to know the truth about Santa, while she was going around school defending his honor...lol...While we broke down and confirmed her otherwise stern innocence to the fact that she was on the fence as well that he was real but also she had curiosities that he wasn't too!! Figuring that it really was time to tell her the truth before more people at school made fun of her, the truth came out...SANTA ISN'T REAL!!! I know, how many hearts did I break!!!

Funny thing was, when she found out her uncle was Santa a couple years in a row, she was upset that he played Santa. Didn't understand why she was upset but she is the age she is and I guess Ill never understand it!! I also informed her that now she is a big girl, she has keep the secret from her sister. After we said that to her, it was a whole different story and it was funny how her mood changed and then she was okay with the fact that Santa wasn't real anymore.

Now, I have started our own family tradition, due to the fact that my Aunt has  completely changed since my grandma passed away or rather after the Christmas of 2010. We all went down for Christmas at Lisa and Chaz's December of 2010 but then after that is when it was like she completely flipped sh*t!! So now, its small but its real family getting together and its nice!!! Its like my Aunts personality completely changed for some reason and no one knows why, I mean I have my suspisions but I will leave them to my own thoughts, but she just is not a very nice person anymore, for lack of better words and we will leave it at that...lol...For some reason she feels the need to look down on to me for several reasons as well as support me with all the things Ive gone through health wise, or the fact that she isnt the least bit happy that Ive come as far as I have and that I was awarded Disability. In fact, she has even said to several people that she feels I don't deserve it. This is a woman, growing up that I looked up to. I guess people do change over time and with age.

In fact, we have changed all of our holidays and its only my father and brother, my girls and myself. Nice and cosey. Just like at Thanksgiving...I made the main part of dinner and my brother and dad brought up the fixins. So for Christmas, Cookies are done...Check!...Shopping is done...Check!!..Now the only thing is my brother has to work that morning which isn't a big problem so they are going to leave as soon as he gets home. We will eat dinner at normal dinner time, open presents and still have time to relax before it gets too late for them to drive home, considering its a 2 hour drive for them...

Now, since I have rambled on...What is your Favorite Childhood Christmas Memory...Please do tell...We would love to hear, Even if its little or big...

Later Taterz~~

Me~~

Hey Ya'll, Hows everyone doing? Well, I am doing great. Just got home from J's dads house. She is staying the night there tonight. He asked her to spend the night after we were there celebrating her birthday as well as her sister Rs'. He made his taco's and they got a cake for the two girls, the two birthdays 3 and 13. I think its rather cool to think that each year its going to be both the same numbers of course  yet there is 10 years difference. While J played Xbox with her father for majority of the visit that we were there, D and R were having a ball. They absolutely hit it off and just played their little hearts out. Then there's the little cat they call "Monster", who actually got along with the girls and D was so gentle with her and was so cute with. After the way I've seen her with Cbass, I thought for sure there was going to be a problem for poor little Monster but low and behold D was so gentle and careful and it was like Monster knew that D was not the same little girl that is normally at the house like R, so Monster never went off on D and clawed or hissed at D. They were so cute. At one point in time, they took turns play swatting each other and then D put down her bottle and started clapping as if hoping that Monster would return the favor and do the same. There was several times that D laid down on her belly by Monster's bed and was petting her back and Monster was enjoying it. Too cute, I must say.

We pulled out the cake and both girls J & R sat down to make a wish and blow out their candles and we sang "Happy Birthday", R plugged her ears and we dished out the cake. Of course I took off D's shirt and put her in the high chair, too many times that I learned my lesson with her and messy things that now I know better. Sure enough, was I ever so right,     she enjoyed her cake way too much. Thats ok because she had fun and that's what is important. She had cake everywhere and I do mean everywhere. D LOVES her cake FOR SURE !!! lol...I will add pictures later of her eating...or rather I mean wearing the cake...lol..

On the way home we got to talking about a couple different things and a topic came up and it was a very interesting point was made and I thought about it and you know what I thought, I need to blog about it because its something that well, we just cant do anymore, like we did when we were kids in the 90's. If anyone has ever heard the song by Bucky Covington, "A Different World", It talks about how life was basically when I was a kid. I remember growing up we would play outside til it was dark and didn't have to worry about strangers like now a days. The rule was come home, do homework, and then go play til dark. Everyone from the block played at the end of the subdivision and everyone's parents knew where we were at and never worried. Now we have to worry and its sad. Life in the 90's were great and its sad that it cant be like it was back then, now we have to worry who lives down the road when our kids are outside playing or who our kids play with and who house our kids go to. When we were kids our parents seem to just know somehow. lol. I guess its come to a point now that we have to know, we cant just sit back and assume everyone is good people. The minute we start assuming everyone is good people is when someone is going to be the bad one out of the mix unfortunately. Sadly enough to say. 

Okay so enough of the rambling of the bad thoughts for today...lol..Well, I guess I am done for today and off to make more of my Christmas cookies, now that I was able to locate my mixer. I was looking and looking for days for my mixer and it was like someone took and was no where to be found in the basement for days. So today I went down there to look for a pair of these boots/shoes that I really wanted to wear today and now I cant find those but low and behold guess what little ole me finds today....tada...My mixer rears its pretty little head out for me and now I can whip out batches and batches of cookies like no tomorrow...wooohooo....yay me!!!!

Later Taterz,
Me!!!

So, its been awhile since I've blogged and I do apologize but its been a very busy but a very stressful time for me. I have been restlessling with many different things lately. I have been going through many different things that I really didnt want to express here but I being a single mother raising two beautiful girls, young girls and girls that are very, well I guess smart in the sense as they see everything going on around them. I have been dealing or rather struggling with my own issues of depression and bipolar and fighting to keep up with the everyday doings of motherhood. I know it shouldn't be that hard. 

What is so hard about getting up everyday, get J off to school, get the D up and feed her, play with her and do whatever needs to be done at the time until she is ready for her afternoon nap. When she goes down for her nap, that should be the time I get my stuff done, like the house work etc. When she gets up feed her lunch and by that time J should be home from school and its time to find out what happened at school and get J to get her chores started and by this time it is time for me to get dinner started. Once this is getting going we eat and I  then I clean up and get D ready for her bath and bedtime and then its Mom and J's time or Mom's time and J's time to do whatever needs to get finished like mom does homework or just veg out and J does her own thing...which mind you is a-o-k...LOL...and now it probably time for J to take her shower and then its J bedtime...Now its surely moms time to do whatever....The day is finally over....Yay!!!!!....

Sure....on paper or rather computer seems simple and easy but for some reason to get it to my mind it is so hard to compute that it is simple and I have major anxiety about it. Even now I am starting to freak out and have an anxiety attack...That simple and Im starting to sweat, heart is starting to race....God what is wrong with me...Someone please If you read this, please tell me what is wrong with me that a simple task like I have wrote about gets me all freaked out....Even trying to plan a simple meal gets me all freaked out. 

My mom, bless her heart, now this is such an emotion topic that I can only talk slightly about but she could whip together a meal no problem, she knew each morning what she was going to make for dinner that night without a problem. She was wonder woman. Later on I will go into detail about my mom...Which I have to because it will help me deal with her, She passed away many years ago and I have yet to deal with it. Sad isnt it...Well, I guess Im going to go because I have to calm myself down somehow and right now this isnt really helping me and I created this blog to help me deal with my issues not create more..lol...silly  how we think one thing but end up doing the complete opposite.

night all...
kelly...

Well, whats new in the house here...Ive got to get myself into a routine...I know I keep saying it but it sure is hard. Trying to find things to say day after and after. Well, D is an absolute monster. I didnt know what a monster was until she began to walk. Man o man...She is horrible. I hope it doesnt get any worse..Im at my witts end..lol...I love her to death but geez...


J...she is at my witts end too...The latest news...She took my white windows phone to school and someone...rather one of her school friends stole it..We have it narrowed down to one of 3 girls...It really irritates me something fierce too...People these days...it just bugs me to no end..what nerve they have to steal someone else's property..I hope we get it back..

I just dont know what to do with her these days. Grounding her doesn't seem to phase her none, threatening her to military school doesnt seem to phase her...arg....I give up....what to do...what to do...Im scared for the teenage years to come...Help me!!!!


Well, later taterz....
me!!!

Howdy all....Had my doctors appointment. Went okay I guess but I have an MRI scheduled for Friday...wooohooo....Today is my day for injections..yep the day has finally come. I am nervous...I know I shouldnt be worried about the pain because well, Ive gone through the most pain already but hey its in my pelvic region ofcourse im going to be nervous...But hey once its done, its over and done with. Right???


I am at my witts end with J...She is being a total shit and I dont know what to do...I am so close to sending her to Military school, I swear to god...Her indignant attitude, condisending attitude...Its really pissing me off big time...Its been going on for some time and shes been grounded off and on but the other day just topped the cake. I let her go with her friends to this volleyball thing and she told me she would be home at 7. She told me that...So I made dinner and waited for 7 to come around, well...it came and went ok, no problem then the time started going by and no J....Before i knew it, it was 8 and still no J..Im freaken out and finally she comes waltzing in the door. I get Im sorry, I didnt know what time it was. With phone in hand, tho the phone doesnt work, the time still does...No remorse, no NOTHING....So Im done....
I called her father and told him what is going on and hes pissed.

On a brighter note, My birthday is in 5 days....The 6th of November...wooohooo, Yay me!!!

Well, until later....
later taterz
Me!!!

Okie dokie, Im back...I took a little time off...I know I shouldnt but hey life gets a little busy with kids and school and just life in general..It shouldnt since I tried to dedicate myself to my blog and I'm going to once again try my hardest to try first thing in the morning to blog my days business and then end it with what has happend!!!

So, I felt great this morning, woke J up and got her off to school, well, she comes in and says mom its so cold out can you drive me to school. Really??? Ya big chicken...Put your jacket on and walk your happy little butt to school...When it gets really cold out then Ill drive ya to school until then nope, not gonna happen..lol..Is that bad of me?? lol...

So, instead of going back and laying down like I usually do while D is sleeping, knowing that I have a boat load of stuff to do today..I got my happy little butt in the shower, did my hair and makeup...You know..mommy time, me time..and gosh...It felt great...and sure enough just as I got finished...I heard D rambling on and on....It was soo cute...So guess what time it was....D time and lord knows if D doesnt get her time when she wants it...The house isnt a happy house...lol..

So fed and changed her and now not only is D a happy camper but Mom can get her stuff worked on and all is well in the house...lol...

So todays plans are...

• Get the car to Volkswagon and call Enterprise for my rental car....
• Come back home and go to my Doctor appt. for x-rays first on my neck and middle back.
• Then my appt. with my surgeon to find the results from the xrays to find out what if any damage is to my upper spine and what happens next.
• Find out if and when my carpal tunnel surgery is....Nice huh!!!
• Find out they are going to blood work to find out why my L5-S1 vertebrae is fused when the surgeons didnt do, which means my body did it...which means I need answers from my surgeon.
• Get my perscription for physical therapy again.
• Schedule physical therapy...Yay...like Im excited about that one...lol..
• Come home and figure out what Im going to make for dinner...which if anyone knows me well enough that is a chore in itself and a big anxiety issue for me....Dont ask me why but it is...

Hopefully by this time I can finally relax and veg for a little while on the couch while J tells me about her day at school. Oh yeah J is bringing home her little boyfriend for me to meet...Should be quite interesting to say the least.

I did however already this morning get my quiz for class done so now all I have to do is 2 replys and I am finished with class for the day. The only problem is usually no one has really posted anything except for the teacher so Ill probably work on my class reply later tonight when everything has been done and dinner has been finished.

So as for no I think Im gonna say see ya...

Later Taterz....
Me.....